Thursday, December 21, 2006

Struck by Lightning in a Bottle

Rough Justice here to play a little devil's advocate with myself and Lefty Specialist's posts regarding Mssrs. Marquis and Lilly. Perhaps there is an answer as to why General Managers prefer to sign high-priced veterans over letting the kids play. Perhaps I will share that answer with you, in two part form, perhaps it will even be coherent, and perhaps you'll even read and enjoy it.
1. Experience: Now experience seems to be the buzzword (is buzzword in and of itself a buzzword? Can it apply to itself? Maybe that's a different post... anyway) when GMs sign grizzled veterans to large contracts. Guys like Craig Counsell, Mark Grudziialifjewofjkakislanik and Ted Lilly are known quantities. Known SHITTY quantities, but KNOWN nevertheless. These players have shown the remarkable quality, to paraphrase Teddy KGB, of having alligator blood. 3IP 8H 9ER 4BB 2K? Don't worry, you'll be out there again next week. 0-4 with three popups? Go get 'em tomorrow. So add that 3IP to your total, those 4 at bats to your tally, because some September, we'll need your veteran leadership as we coast to a third place finish, 10+ games out of first. Why the obsession with experience? Who the FUCK knows! Craig Counsell is a millionaire three times over because he talks to teammates in the clubhouse and is a generally nice guy, of course it doesn't hurt that he holds his bat like a drunk clinging to a telephone pole and managed to get hit by Mariano Rivera BY STANDING TOO GODDAMN CLOSE TO MARIANO'S FUCKING PLATE in that game that never happened back in 2001. Otherwise, he sucks. No range at any infield position (I have NO statistical backing on this, but if things like range factor continually show Jeter to be the worst fielding shortstop in the majors, I have to question just who the fuck is judging these things), has no power since that magical time noone cared if a hypodermic was hanging out of your asscheek, and is frequently injured thanks to his "gritty," "dirty-uniform," "scrappy," and "extremely caucasian" play. Whoops, this turned into a Craig Counsell lovefest here.
My point about experience basically is that the only way to GET it is by playing, irregardless of performance as these three examples show. Why not let a twenty-two year old somewhere in the minors hit Counsell's .255/.327/.347? It is absurd to think that merely by changing uniforms, Counsell or Lilly will magically begin to realize potential THEY'VE NEVER SHOWN. Which leads to my second and final point.
2. Lightning in a bottle: Remember 1996? Sure, it was in the heart of those years MLB would just as soon forget about, but forget that for a moment. A man known to his friends as Brady Anderson hit 50 homeruns that year. Previous career high? 21. Post 1996 high? 24. Leave out the obvious conclusion that the same diabolical conspiracy that poisoned Shawn Merriman (WARNING: NFL REFERENCE) worked its magic on Brady that year, and that is Jim Hendry's wet dream: sign a veteran with a middling track record (Lilly's 59-58, Marquis' 56-52) and hope for the big year. No doubt Hendry will be praying to whatever idle idol (oooh a homonym) Cubs fans pray to that flower boy and J-Marq can magically get to the next level. He'll never admit it, but these two are on the Sign-and-Pray plan in Chi-town.
As a post-script, why not give the aforementioned Sean Marshall a chance at compiling some experience, maybe he'll actually be ABOVE average... and if not, go ahead and let him compile some mediocre numbers so he can sign a massive deal in 6 or 7 years.

Strapped for Cash? Throw a Baseball!

Seemingly this is what is has come down to this winter as the hot stove keeps burning: If you can pitch, GM's will throw money at you.

My partner in crime here touched on some things in his previous post that Id like to get into, comment on, debate, whatever. Jason Marquis. Bad man. Very Bad. (In the words of Baboo Bot) RJ (Rough Justice for those just catching on) gave you the numbers so I wont give you those again but suffice it to say...not good. Let's stick with the Cubs for a minute here. Last year was an absolute abomination for them. Good news was they could let their young kids pitch so they can be ready for next year right? Oh wait they just spent money on the wildly overrated Ted Lilly and Jason Marquis. Some might argue that Lilly will be this year's Jeff Weaver in the national league. I for one can't believe I just wrote that sentence. Anyone who follows the AL east will tell you the only reason Ted Lilly even has AVERAGE stats is because he absolutely destroys the Red Sox, Yankees, Orioles, and D-rays every year. Look at is this way, your team is now paying Ted Lilly and Jason Marquis a combined 17 million per year, when you could have had Barry Zito and Sean Marshall (who will give you similar if not better production) filling the same two rotation holes for equal if not less money. The result of this also creates a better situation should you make the playoffs. Tell me, would a playoff rotation of Zambrano, Zito, Prior (God willing), and either Kerry Wood/Rich Hill/Sean Marshall look more intimidating than say Zambrano, Lilly, Prior (God willing), Marquis? Im taking the quality over quantity every time.

Now ok, it remains to be seen how it will turn out for the Cubs, but lets look away from them right now and hey if they fuck it up, they can just go spend more money like the Red Sox are doing (another topic for another time, Im not ready yet). Other clubs don't have this luxury. Lets look at the Royals for instance. The royals have been an abyss since the George Brett days. The worst part is that management seems to have no effing clue what the hell they want to do. They go out and sign guys like Reggie Sanders, Gil Meche, Mark Grudzielanek, etc. etc. all the while touting their young guns. Well which is it? Youth or Experience? To me, if you are a struggling team with seemingly no chance to compete, why not blow it all up and let your youngsters develop at the Major League level? If I were a Royals fan, Id be in multiple dumpsters right now from letting an axe murderer kill me over the lack of direction this team has. Not everyone will pull a Marlins and be in contention with an average age of 17, but, more likely, young teams will be in the realm of the Pirates. At the very least id rather KNOW what my team is trying to do than toil in the realm of sub-mediocrity. Teams that build from youth at least have a light at the end of the tunnel.

One other thing to note, I do, in fact,still have wet dreams about a healthy Mark Prior.

-Tony Fossas, the Lefty Specialist.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Not Exactly a Marquis Signing... HAHAHAHA!!!

Aaaand the title might be a little too clever. I'm here (as your resident RATIONAL Yankee fan) to discuss the Jason Marquis signing by the Cubs. Now, OO7 here (Lefty Specialist to you blog whores) has a small side business as a tragic Cubs fan. The poor son of a bitch, before they cancelled the 2004 World Series (electroshock therapy still hasn't freed me to admit what actually occurred, but I'm seeing a Buddhist about it), was rooting for two teams who had gone a combined 182 years without a championship. He will still occasionally wake up at 4am, having moistened his panties at the thought of Mark Prior pitching healthy (which will never happen).
This leads me to what I wanted to address here. It is one thing to see your team thoroughly suck its way to a 66-96 record and know that something needs to be done, but it is quite another to go batshit crazy with your boss's cash. I applaud GM Jim Hendry for opening up the traditionally hymen-tight purse strings of the Tribune Corp. to sign some prime (for this awful offseason anyway) free agents like Alfonso "Inning-killing Strikeout" Soriano and Ted "Maddeningly Inconsistent" Lilly for Lou Pineilla to scream at next year, but let's get serious for a second.
As an aside, I will be doing that "quotes between a player's name" thing alot, notice how funny that was? See, I take the players name, then I insert a clever snippet of their talent or distinguishing feature right there in the middle. Here, watch this: Randy "Tiny Penis" Johnson, Curt "I'll Have Another Milkshake" Schilling or even Josh "Ouch, Ouch, My Finger" Beckett.
Back to Marquis. So Jim Hendry has a near-death experience striking a deal with Yankee castoff Ted Lilly, but then doesn't heed the word of his creator and tempts death AGAIN by signing Jason Marquis. Now, it goes without saying that Marquis' 6.02 ERA was the highest among all pitchers who qualified for the ERA title (which means that they pitched at least one inning for every game that their team played i.e. 162 IP over 162 game season). But among ALL PITCHERS who pitched in the major leagues this season, Marquis' ERA ranked him 481st of 635.
"But Rough Justice," you'll cry, "maybe he was extraordinarily unlucky! What about his peripherals?" Well, you are a moron, because you've fallen into my obvious and ill-conceived trap, so let's examine those peripherals:
He struck out 4.45 batters/9IP, good for 72nd among the 80 qualifying pitchers, 522nd out of the aforementioned 635. Still more telling of his true atrociousness is his K/BB ratio (that's strikeouts per walks for you Angels and Diamondbacks fans) of 1.28. That means for every batter he walked, he struck out 1.28 (ranked 459 out of 635). Compare that to Greg Maddux, who, despite being old and decrepit, managed to post a K/BB ratio of 3.16. Unfair comparison, you might say? Fuck you, I might say. But how about Jeff "Eye of the Tiger" Weaver, another vomit-inducing ex-Yankee, who came in with a ratio of 2.28? Or Rodrigo "Yo Soy Un Poquito" Lopez at 2.31? Any league average pitcher should be striking out two men for every one walked (2.00). An inability to strike out batters combined with a propensity to walk batters means that a pitcher is a walking, talking big inning for the opposition, because a one-out walk doesn't mean, in the words of Jim Mora, Sr., DIDDLY POO, if you strike out the next two batters in the inning. Marquis not only was giving up one out walks, but batters (who hit .289 off of him, which isn't the WORST batting average against, but it's close) magically turned into Johnny Damon to the tune of a .364 OBP and a .509 Slugging, kept walking and getting hits long after an excusable walk was handed out by J-Marq.
So, 21 million dollars later, the Cubs plan on running Marquis out there every fifth day. A guy who gave up 35 home runs pitching half his games in a pitcher's park, who will now be pitching in the friendly, and really really small, confines of Wrigley field. Projections? We are not in the business of projecting. I am, however, in the business of making bold proclamations that end up being way off base (although that is REALLY REALLY unlikely here). In that spirit, he'll be in the bullpen by June.
This underscores a much larger problem in the major leagues, and what will be a constant theme throughout my criticisms of GM moves. GMs spend way too much money on shitty pitching. Jim Hendry, for one, just spent $21 million dollars on a shitty pitcher. What I don't understand is that there are any number of minor league workhorses, career shitkickers, and starry-eyed hopefuls that could give you the same or better numbers than Jason MOTHERFUCKING Marquis. Using them has three benefits:
ONE: Lets a GM see what he has in his farm system, no reason to keep a 40-man roster spot open for a guy who pitches worse than Jason Marquis.
TWO: YOU DON'T PAY JASON FUCKING MARQUIS TWENTY-ONE MILLION DOLLARS!
THREE: YOU DON'T PAY JASON FUC... gaaaaah. Sorry, aneurysm.
Me and Double-Oh were having a discussion the other day about what Johan Santana would make in this completely insane market for pitching. 12 years $300 million? 20 years $400 million? He'd be the first 30 game winner since McClain on the Yankees or ::gasp:: Red Sox. Anyway, I'd better wrap up this ridiculously long post, Jeff "Evolution is a Myth" Suppan will be signing his Kevin Brown contract any minute.... GAH!

A Bit of Background

I suppose the first post in a blog should give you readers a bit of background into who I am. Well, let me first say that I am the (diehard) Red Sox fan portion of this blog. Also by default that makes me the smarter pea in this pod.

Now, let me recount a tale that will tell you all need to know about us both, and our passion for sport.

It was a crisp October night in 2003, the Yankees and Red Sox were engaging in their titanical battle for the ALCS title. It was Game #7 to be precise. The Red Sox had jumped out to an early lead as Peter Martinez was spinning a gem, carving another niche in Red Sox lore. Now as fate would have it my co-poster and I would be roomates in college that year, but, alas, we would not be watching the game together (he was with other yankee fans presumably worshipping satan or whatever it is they do). Anyway, with the Red Sox comfortably ahead entering the middle innings I was growing more nervous by the second. Surely this can't be happening, and my dreams couldn't possibly be realizing before my eyes. Just then as the 6th inning was approaching (or ending its all a blur to me), my roommate entered, blood boiling, his eyes a cold, murderous, red. Before I can say a word he says to me quietly "Congratulations". Remember folks the revolution ('04) hadn't happened yet, this was a time where fate was against us and even the slightest jinx could set the world's axis of its tilt and thus end the Red Sox's chances against the yankees. A mere "congratulations"...and it was over for me. I said, "It's not over yet"(praying this would set back his jinxing word, pulling the switcheroo on the baseball gods), and the rest as we say, is history. God, I hate being the smart one.

Enjoy.

-Chris

Inaugural

Goooooooood afternoon everybody! This blog, by its title and discussion, will serve as an ode, a symphony, a tribute, if you will, to the great Dale Sveum; bit player on the best Yankee team of my generation (1998 for you Mets fans) and best Red Sox 3B coach a Yankee fan could ask for. Dale Sveum We Hardly Knew Ye will have two posters (under the same name until I figure out how to add another). One a Red Sox fan, one a rational (this is important for later discussion) Yankee fan (that's me!), we aim to discuss mainly baseball, with perhaps a smattering of NFL football, while discussing all of the reasons why we should be running an MLB franchise instead of the morons that are doing it today. In the structure of this blog, we shall realize our dreams.
I fully expect to be put in charge, along with my co-blogger, of a minor-league franchise within two months of this, our inaugural post. Let's make it happen, people.